October 2011 | Girls - Pak and Indian

Monday, 31 October 2011

Psychiatrist v/s Bartender (Joke)

Jay went to a psychiatrist. "Doc, he said, "I've got trouble. Every time
I get into bed I think there is somebody under it. I get under the bed;
I think there's somebody on top of it. Top, under, under top. I'm going
crazy!" "Just put yourself in my hands for two years," said the shrink.
"Come to me three times a week and I'll cure you." "How much do you
charge?"
"A hundred dollars per visit."
"I'll think about it."
Jay never went back. Some time later he met the doctor on the street.
"Why didn't you ever come to see me again? Asked the psychiatrist. "For
a hundred bucks a visit? A bartender cured me for 10 dollars." "Is that
so! How?"
"He told me to cut the legs off the bed."

Honeymoon Blast (Joke)

On the first honeymoon night an Indian woman was asked by her friend how did the first night of her marriage go!

Woman, "Well, I was all ready waiting for him in bed, he came, he took my Saree off"
Friend, "Then"
Woman said, "He took my glittering Blouse off."
Friend, "Then"
Woman, "then he took my Silky bra off and clicked my nipple."
Friend, "Then"
Woman, "He unravel strings and pulled my Ghagharo from over my legs."
Friend, "Then"
Woman, "Then he took my Panties off"
Friend, "Then"
Woman, "I was sighing ha-ho-he, was stark naked and juicing on bed, he took all my clothes and dump them on wall hanger."
Friend, "Then"
Woman, "Hanger broke"
Friend, "Then"
Woman, "He spent rest of the whole night fixing hanger."

Friday, 28 October 2011

Refrigerator .. (Joke)

It got crowded in heaven, so, for one day it was decided only to accept people who had really had a bad day on the day they died. St. Peter was standing at the pearly gates and said to the first man, "Tell me about the day you died."

The man said, "Oh, it was awful. I was sure my wife was having an affair, so I came home early to catch her with him. I searched all over the apartment but couldn't find him anywhere. So I went out onto the balcony, we live on the 25th floor, and found this man hanging over the edge by his fingertips. I went inside, got a hammer, and started hitting his hands. He fell, but landed in some bushes. So, I got the refrigerator and pushed it over the balcony and it crushed him. The strain of the act gave me a heart attack, and I died."

St. Peter couldn't deny that this was a pretty bad day, and since it was a crime of passion, he let the man in.

He then asked the next man in line about the day he died. "Well, sir, it was awful," said the second man. "I was doing aerobics on the balcony of my 26th floor apartment when I twisted my ankle and slipped over the edge. I managed to grab the balcony of the apartment below, but some maniac came out and started pounding on my fingers with a hammer. Luckily I landed in some bushes. But, then the guy dropped a refrigerator on me!"

Thursday, 27 October 2011

Joke: A girl was crying bitterly!

A girl was crying bitterly!
Mom: wht happnd dear?http://groups.yahoo.com/group/hindi_internet_love_making_stories/
Daughter: mom do i luk like a wicked witch?
Mom: no!http://groups.yahoo.com/group/hindi_internet_love_making_stories/
D: r my eyes big as toad?
... .Mom: no!
D: is my nose flat?
Mom: no baby!http://groups.yahoo.com/group/hindi_internet_love_making_stories/
D: am i fat like a bulldog?
Mom: u hve a fine physiqe,u r my barbie doll!
D: then why people tell me that u luk like ur mom??

Joke: oye chintu tere pass 5 aaple ha

teacher chintu se : oye chintu tere pass 5 aaple ha

chintu : kya mere pass

teacher : arre bhosdike k soch na k tere 5 apple ha....tere baap ka kya jata ha
... http://groups.yahoo.com/group/hindi_internet_love_making_stories/
chintu : achaa

tecaher : 2 tune pinky ko diye... 2 pintu ko aur ek muje to tere pass kitne bache

chintu : sir 7

teacher : bhnchod 7 kese bache

chintu : sochle na sale tere baap ka kya jata ha..:P

Tuesday, 25 October 2011

Duniya Darshan {Glimpses from around the World} Exotic GREECE - 3 of 5

Friday, 21 October 2011

Hot Photoshoot of a Desi Model :::--- JM

<>_<>still, no answer<>_<>

<>_<>still, no answer<>_<>

I gave my first love my heart

Only for it to be crushed
With no answers:.
Every single moment that passed
Went through my mind
Over, and over
Memories of love, passion, lust
Confusion, stubbornness, and heartache
Thinking "What went wrong?"
Still:.
No answers:
Trying to get the fire back
I tried:.
Not knowing that he had
Forgot the past in so little time
But me:
Still clinging to what it was
What "we" used to mean:
Didn't let go so easily
Tears shed
Voices shouting
A kiss shared
Still:
No answers:
When I think back at what happened
I still wonder
"What went wrong?"
I still imagine that boy and that girl

Thinking, planning, wondering
I still can see those passionate kisses
Them each saying "I love you"
And truly mean it
And both thinking,
"I am completely in love with this person"
Still,
No explanations to change of heart
Still,
No closure to what a simple sentence
Changed both of their lives
Still:.
No answers:.

Thursday, 20 October 2011

Joke: Six Inches

Coming into the bar and ordering a double, the man leaned over and confided to the bartender, "I'm so pissed off !"

"Oh yeah? What happened?" asked the bartender politely.

"See, I met this beautiful woman who invited me back to her home. We stripped off our clothes and jumped into bed and we were just about to make love when her god damned husband came in the front door. So I had to jump out of the bedroom window and
hang from the ledge by my fingernails!"

"Gee, that's tough!" commiserated the bartender.

"Right, but that's not what really got me aggravated," the customer went on.

"When her husband came into the room he said 'Hey great! You're
naked already! Let me just take a leak.' And damned if the lazy
son of a bitch didn't piss out the window right onto my head?"

"Yeech!" the bartender shook his head. "No wonder you're in a lousy mood."

"Yeah, but I haven't told you what really, really got to me.

Next, I had to listen to them grunting and groaning and when they finished, the husband tossed his condom out of the window.
And where does it land? My damned forehead!"

"Damn, that really is a drag!" says the bartender.

"Oh, I'm not finished. See what really pissed me off was when
the husband had to take a dump. It turns out that their toilet is broken, so he stuck his ass out of the window and let loose right on my head !"

The bartender paled. "That would sure mess up my day."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," the fellow rattled on, "but do you know what
REALLY, REALLY, REALLY pissed me off? When I looked down and saw
that my feet were only SIX inches off the ground!!"

Wednesday, 19 October 2011

*If you love someone,

Set her free...

If she comes back, she's yours,

If she doesn't, she never was....

But reent studies shows it varies from person to person according to the hormones

THE NEW VERSIONS R.....

Pessimist:

If you love someone,

Set her free ...

If she ever comes back, she's yours,

If she doesn't, as expected, she never was

Optimist:

If you love someone,

Set her free ...

Don't worry, she will come back.

Suspicious:

If you love someone,

Set her free ...

If she ever comes back, ask her why.

Impatient:

If you love someone,

Set her free ...

If she doesn't come back within some time forget her.

Patient:

If you love someone, Set her free ...

If she doesn't come back,

continue to wait until she comes back ...

Playful

If you love someone,

Set her free ...

If she comes back, and if you love her still,

set her free again, repeat .....

C++ Programmer:

if(you-love( m_she))

m_she.free()

if(m_she == NULL)

m_she = new CShe;

Animal-Rights Activist:

If you love someone,

Set her free,

In fact, all living creatures deserve to be free!!

Lawyers:

If you love someone,

Set her free,

Clause 1a of Paragraph 13a-1 in the Second

Amendment of the Matrimonial Freedom

Biologist :

If you love someone,

Set her free,

She'll evolve.

Statisticians :

If you love someone,

Set her free,

If she loves you, the probability of her coming

back is high

If she doesn't, your relation was improbable

anyway.

Schwarzenegger' s fans:

If you love someone,

Set her free,

SHE'LL BE BACK!

Over possessive person :

If you love someone

don't set her free.

MBA :

If you love someone set her free instantaneously

and look for others simultaneously

Psychologist :

If you love someone

set her free

If she comes back her super ego is dominant

If she doesn't come back her id is supreme

If she doesn't go, she must be crazy.

Somnabulist :

If you love someone

set her free

If she comes back it's a nightmare

If she doesn't, you must be dreaming.

ERP functional expert :

If you love someone

set her free

If she comes back, map her into your system

If she doesn't, carry out a gap-fit analysis

Finance expert :

If you love someone

set her free

If she comes back, its time to look for fresh loans

If she doesn't, write her off as an asset gone bad.

Marketing Specialist :

If you love someone

set her free

If she comes back she has brand loyalty

If she doesn't, reposition the brand in new market ....